We live in a world where we share the good news, whether it’s on Facebook, Twitter, Instagram, etc. When someone speaks up with a negative opinion, we’re quick to shut it down in the comments (albeit, that person just wanted to hate on their friends for posting about PokemonGO on Facebook, and that’s not how you treat your friends). But we’re human, and every day is not always a good day.

On down days like today, I exorcise those demons by writing.

For a while, I felt like I was on the tip of landing a job, just within reach, all I needed was for that one interview to go well enough that someone was brave enough to say “Yes!” Now, I feel like I’m in a slump. No interviews in two weeks. No contact from applications I’ve put in. And while I’m grateful July is a busy month for me volunteer-wise, it doesn’t answer the questions in the back of my mind.

What did I do wrong?

What is wrong with me?

And all the while, it is expected that we put on a facade, a mask to cover the frustration and the disappointment of knowing that I probably will get shot down. Again. The only thing stopping me from enjoying this time and calling this “funemployment” is the student debt that’s coming my way in a few months.

I hate the mask. It’s not reality. The reality is that I have to check “Prefer not to answer” when it comes to voluntary disclosure. The reality is even though I want to stay in South Dakota, the state of employment is a hypocritical mess: lowest unemployment rate, efforts to keep high school graduates in-state, and yet thre are no jobs for college graduates or they’re passed up for experienced individuals. The reality is how many keywords you use in your resume, rather than the quality of the content.

This is one of those down days for me. So instead of inspiring quotes about “empowerment” and “positivity,” this is my reminder and message: It’s safe to come out from behind the mask. You’re not alone.


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